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Dealing with difficult relationships in the workplace

by Joanna Konstantopoulou

The modern workplace can, at times, be a hotbed of politics and intrigue. Interpersonal relationships can be strained and productivity can suffer as a result. Ambition and ego are often at the root of these problems, as well as personality clashes and differences of opinion. Conflict can of course lead to increased creativity, however prolonged alienation and tension will increase stress upon the body and mind. A difficulty with even one workmate can ruin a well-paid and enjoyable job for the most tolerant of individuals. What can help us to deal with a difficult interpersonal relationship and the stress that it can inflict upon us?

Accepting People

We all have different backgrounds and experiences in life. These variables greatly influence our outlook and also our reaction to the various situations that the workplace will throw at us. Recognising that this is true of everyone is a big first step in overcoming our own adverse response to negative provocation. There are times that our workmates cannot help how they feel or how they initially react. Recognising that their life experiences have led them to this point in their life, and their opinion is an end result of the sum total of these experiences, can give us a moment of pause and a vital insight on how to deal more effectively with them.

The intended end result of keeping this fact in mind is that our own mental stress can be contained within manageable levels.

Dealing With Ego

Effectively suppressing our own ego is a tremendous aid in personal development. We are far more effective in teamwork, assisting others and reaching our own potential if our motives are not selfish. Dealing with other people’s egotism can be disheartening and a potent source of mental distress.

A very effective way to deal with someone who is clearly motivated by their own ambition or ego is to initially give them what they want. That may be a listening ear, a “soap box” or a perceived personal “win” at your expense. When we react without any trace of ego and in a spirit of cooperation then we help move the situation in a direction that benefits everyone. The person in question is often surprised and left with no axe to grind.

This is only an initial reaction. After the dust has settled, in private we can then explain clearly and mildly the negative repercussions of their method of handling the foregoing circumstances. Then point out the many benefits of handling problems in a different and usually more unselfish manner (although we may not use those exact words).

If a similar situation arises again then mildly but firmly reminding them of the possible negative outcomes to their methods is usually all that is needed to thwart a repeat of their approach.

This is only a brief overview of dealing with difficult relationships within the workplace. If you would like more information or help with this subject please feel free to contact me to see how health psychology can help develop and maintain productive accord in the work environment.

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